Today is a special day for someone very dear to me but to honest as much as I want to wish that person all the happiness in the world it’s hard too. A lot has been happening within the past couple years that despite all the good memories and things that are shared and about that person… the bad tramples over the good so only the bad memories and things remain. That’s how it is for both parties effected. And while I want to believe that God has a bigger plan, it’s at times like this that makes it hard to believe in anything good.
People tell me that despite mistakes and wrongs I should be in full support, but if those mistakes and wrongs were directed to you and your loved ones… can you really just forget everything and just pretend like nothing happened when you were the one that was accused of so many wrongs and mistakes?
There is no right or wrong in this situation. Both parties partake in the wrongs and rights but it is up to both parties to come to an understanding with each other. But what if neither parties can come to an understanding with each other causing hardships and uncertainties of the what is to come in the future?
During times like this I wish I was a child again. To be frank, as a child, maybe it’s because children are naive and innocent, there is no uncertainty. You have your parents or guardians, friends, siblings, imaginary friends, and so many people and things you can rely on that you aren’t faced with the difficulties that seem so gray in contrast to the black and white spectrum. You aren’t uncertain because of the loved ones and things that surround you. One could argue that as child you don’t have to make any hard decisions and it’s your parents that make it for you causing no uncertainty. However, I will have to disagree. Because of your loved ones that surround you, you are so sure with everything you do and you know that even when you fall or fail, your loved ones are able to catch you.
So the question is: Why is it different in adulthood? Your loved ones start to fade away or end up walking away and even your loved ones who stay… well times change people and you are more exposed to the evil things in the world that you start to question everything and life difficulties can change a person drastically, and there are even more factors and reasoning behind everything that happens to each and every person that a child who was able to run through the woods with no worries becomes a child afraid of the monsters and creatures that roam in the woods that even the thought of the woods frightens the child.
Despite all the uncertainty… I still hope for the best for someone who is still so dear to me despite the hurt and wrongs the person has inflicted on me. Because even though the people I know that person wanted there dearly is not there…. I hope that person knows how much we still love him even through all of this…